As result of a temporary restraining order handed down Tuesday, a Chicago office worker accused by his colleagues of unrelenting email inanity will be enjoined from using either his “Reply to All” or “All Staff” email functions without explicit managerial approval. The restraining order was issued by the presiding judge in the case, Cook County Circuit Court Judge Michael Strong.

Judge Strong heard initial arguments in the case, Merkle McDonough vs. Kimble, on Tuesday afternoon. The plaintiffs, 24 of the 25 employees of Merkle McDonough, a Loop-based Tax Accounting firm, filed civil suit seeking to enjoin the defendant, James Kimble, 36, of Evanston, the firm’s 25^th employee, from sending broadcast messages on the office’s Microsoft Outlook.

During Tuesday’s hearings, the Court heard testimony from several plaintiffs, including Marilyn Roberts, 54, of Roscoe Village.

“I like James. He’s a nice guy,” Roberts explained. “He takes Starbucks orders whenever he goes, and he once offered to water my desk plants when I was on vacation. But if I have to read one more email that tells me he’s leaving fifteen minutes early to make it to his daughter’s soccer game on time, I’m gonna flip my shit.”

Other plaintiffs echoed Roberts’ sentiment. Brad Ortiz, 49, of Oak Park, was Kimble’s direct manager when the defendant joined the company in 2002.

“James is by most measures a terrific employee,” explained Ortiz. “While we value his contributions, and want him to stay on board, he has wantonly violated basic email protocol. For instance, last week Darlene Foster sent out an email asking for information about a presentation the firm gave in Urbana three years ago. James replied to everyone, and said, ‘Sorry Darlene, can’t help ya’ there.’ That reply wasn’t necessary for Darlene, and it sure as hell wasn’t necessary for me!”

John Major, attorney for the plaintiffs, presented a wealth of hard evidence in addition to the testimony. Particularly noteworthy was Major’s presention of an analysis of Kimble’s Sent Messages. The analysis exhibited that Kimble sent more than 3,100 “Reply to All” or “All Staff” emails during 2008 alone. Of those 3,100, nearly 1,200 were “Replies to All” stating either “Sounds good,” “Looking forward to it,” or “Awesome, thanks!” In 2008, Kimble even sent 65 emails with a smiley face alone, averaging more than one smiley face a week.

The Court also saw a slew of Kimble’s superfluous “All Staff” emails including: “great episode of Lost last night, huh?” and “Meatball Marinara….gotta love the $5 footlong!”

A controversy is already brewing in the wake of Tuesday’s decision, prompting some activists to get involved. The ACLU released a statement regarding the case.

“While we all know the nuisance of “Reply to All” and “All Staff” emails, today’s ruling sets a dangerous precedent. By restricting Mr. Kimble’s right to send emails at his own discretion, Judge Strong has taken us to the precipice of a very slippery slope,” the statement said. “What’s next: a court-ordered ban on rambling incoherent voicemails? Judicial standards for water cooler chit-chat? Where does this end?”

A final ruling on Kimble’s long term email rights is expected later this week.

This was written by Chandler Goodman for The Daily Blank. It is licensed under an Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. If you love it, please re-post the complete article (including this blurb) on your site. We'd be flattered.